(442-450) Family Values 442-443

The Dodder-plant;
A long rope is not auspicious.

The members of my family have seen me as a kind person who does well in school and will do anything for others. I am not greedy, therefore I am an artist. I am very much a family person and I know many people who are gay or lesbian who have just as strong (or stronger) family feeling as I do. Why must such authority figures as Jesse Helms lead the country in making it difficult for us to be able to live in peace and nurture and protect our families? How can an oppressive government that comes down hard on gays and artists say that they are doing it in the name of "traditional" family values? They promote hate. What we need is love and acceptance.

444

There lacks the dragon-shaped gem,
And the other jade ornaments.

My family seems to be growing as I find more out about my ancestors. Every generation back reveals hundreds more cousins. We are not all "white." Some of us are gay. Some of us were adapted and many of us have been very poor, but we love each other dearly and help each other in our time of need. Those are family values. It is not about condoning or not condoning but about acceptance and love.

445-447

The running deer longs to be a mouse;
It succeeds -- it is not restrained.

Dream -

Cows grazing forming geometrical shapes.
Each one frees itself through running.
One, free as a flying horse, runs on my pillow.
''Rachel funny!'' laughs funny Rachel.

448-450

Bright pearls,
Playing on lutes
Flying fingers
Such achievement -- not to be repeated.

Excerpt from journal - My beautiful daughter is fast asleep here at Chili's. She has been so lovable and I have been able to give a lot of attention. She got a little fussy when I had to give Kirk his lesson. She's gotten to where she's requesting all kinds of songs for me to sing, especially when we're in the car. The current repertoire is as follows:

Hafra (Mahamantra/Various Bajans)
Abeebeeda (scat singing)
Rogers (Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood song)
Yokyo (Noh-styled improvisation about our cat)
Nina (Italian Aria)

She composes her own pieces through me by requesting a fragment and then saying ''sh-sh-sh'' for me to stop or say ''sh-sh'' with her. Of course, she will also sing with or without my interaction. Her singing greatly influences the scat singing and Yokyo. Sometimes she will just say ''more song?'' which gives me a little more freedom to choose my own selection.

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